http://www.jointhemob.org/do-they-ever-feel-remorse/ movement opposing bullying Mon, 30 Jan 2012 15:17:39 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 http://www.jointhemob.org/do-they-ever-feel-remorse/#comment-24 Mark Rogers Sun, 22 Jan 2012 19:10:43 +0000 http://www.jointhemob.org/?p=265#comment-24 Joella, what a fine legacy you've given the world: your watchful son--and your own vigilance! Meanwhile, I wonder what those past bullies have added to the world--hopefully better children. Perhaps, they have seen their own children being bullied (Karma) and finally understand the pain. Joella, what a fine legacy you’ve given the world: your watchful son–and your own vigilance! Meanwhile, I wonder what those past bullies have added to the world–hopefully better children. Perhaps, they have seen their own children being bullied (Karma) and finally understand the pain.

]]> http://www.jointhemob.org/do-they-ever-feel-remorse/#comment-19 Wylde Abandyn Sun, 22 Jan 2012 14:45:37 +0000 http://www.jointhemob.org/?p=265#comment-19 No, Joella, I don't think they ever do feel remorse. I saw a talk show about 10 years ago (Rikki Lake or Jenny Jones or something) where they had people confronting their bullies after the victims grew up. The bullies sometimes didn't even remember the people or argued back that there was nothing to feel bad about or apologize for because they were "just being kids." And that's the problem, I think. To the bullies, it's really nothing but a way to pass the time. They don't carry it with them. If they are insecure or cold and mean enough to bully someone in the first place, they don't have the emotional capacity to feel remorse later. The people they hurt don't matter to them in the future any more than they matter at the time of the abuse. I wish that the people on the receiving end of the bad treatment could divest themselves of the memories (or at least the emotion associated with the memories) as easily as the abusers do. Steve often kids me about my poor memory, but in some ways I think I'm better off. I was bullied and I know it hurt at the time, but all that seems so far in the past now that I don't feel it really affects me today. I remember some of the incidents, but there's no emotion tied to it. It's more like remembering scenes from some old movie I once saw. No, Joella, I don’t think they ever do feel remorse. I saw a talk show about 10 years ago (Rikki Lake or Jenny Jones or something) where they had people confronting their bullies after the victims grew up. The bullies sometimes didn’t even remember the people or argued back that there was nothing to feel bad about or apologize for because they were “just being kids.” And that’s the problem, I think. To the bullies, it’s really nothing but a way to pass the time. They don’t carry it with them. If they are insecure or cold and mean enough to bully someone in the first place, they don’t have the emotional capacity to feel remorse later. The people they hurt don’t matter to them in the future any more than they matter at the time of the abuse. I wish that the people on the receiving end of the bad treatment could divest themselves of the memories (or at least the emotion associated with the memories) as easily as the abusers do. Steve often kids me about my poor memory, but in some ways I think I’m better off. I was bullied and I know it hurt at the time, but all that seems so far in the past now that I don’t feel it really affects me today. I remember some of the incidents, but there’s no emotion tied to it. It’s more like remembering scenes from some old movie I once saw.

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